Be Bad & Kill Little Girls

BioShock The more I play this game the more I wonder at the main character's size... other than the man hands he/she seems sooo short. He isn't even eye level with the door knobs. I'm almost thinking that there's gonna be a hidden surprise at the end that reveals you are a little girl like the one's you've been killing... um I mean rescuing.

Speaking of which, after reading a few comments on the game on MySpace it made me restart the game and not kill the little girls. The commentators claimed that when you saved the little sisters they would give you cool stuff and a lot of extra Adam (Upgrade Currency). So far it's not seeming worthwhile to me, yah I got a cool 'Hypnotise Big Daddy Plasmid' that convinces the big tough guy to look after me, but lets do the math here.

Killing, or "harvesting" 3 little sisters gets you 160 Adam each so: 480. And saving three of them gets you 80 each and 200 after the third with a plasmid and some ammo so 440 Adam. With that extra 40 Adam you could get a new Plasmid power of your choice every 6 girls you kill. The ones they give you are pretty crappy. I restarted the whole game cuz I got the impression that being a "good guy" would be cool. Ain't that an oxymoron. Being good in games sucks. If you play this, I say: Kill the little girls!!!

Getting my Online DND Badge

So I've decided to jump onto the Online RPG Band wagon, and chose to do it on the DND: Stormreach site. I didn't choose WOW because, it's crammed down my throat too much with all the Mister T and William Shatner adds. Anything using those two as representatives has to be pretty lame. You will find me there as either "Stickylips" or "Enyo Stickylips". Don't ask, I won't tell : ) I'll post some screen shots an pics of my gorgeous self as an Elf Barbarian/Sorceress. (I love a girl who can kick ass!)

Music of the Soul: 8 bit Tunes by 8-bit Philharmonic

I just discovered the awesomest thing that's happened to 8 bit games since the release of Zelda's game saving capabilities! There's a guy on myspace called 8-bit Philharmonic, who takes retro system soundtracks and turns them into heart wrenching orchestra music. From his Super Mario tribute "The Mushroom Kingdom" that sounds very festive in this holiday season, to his "Courage in the Face of Power", which follows the music of the dungeons in Zelda, It's all very impressive. I'm disappointed though in the length of Courage in the Face of Power; it cuts off when it seems like it's about to explode. I'd be interested to find out if he's actually playing the violin or if it's a violin sample from a program like Protools or Cakewalk he's working with... and also wonder if he's on Mac or PC, cuz I use Cakewalk's Sonar on my PC, but all the music people at Tom Lee swear you can never make anything good come out of anything windows based... Check him out at his Myspace page

More on Zelda: Twilight Princess for Wii

Like all of the Zelda games from the resent past, Twilight Princess begins with Link being unarmed and clueless that he’s the “chosen one”. How many times will link go through this before he realises he’s special? And you’d think Princess Zelda would stop being such a victim and start fighting her own battles and I don’t mean by disguising herself as a nomad and teaching Link magical flute songs like she did in Ocarina of Time either. In other words, I think the Zelda crew need to come up with something a little different to catch my attention next time. How ‘bout this:

Zelda and Link are happily married in the next one and some evil bastard comes and steals their baby, so they go together (you switch between characters like in Sudeki, cool eh?) and have to kick in some teeth, take some names and try and rescue it, but it takes many years and in the end the super crazy twist is the evil bastard that kidnapped Link-baby also train it to be evil and Zelda has to battle and kill her own child in the end to save Hyrule from eternal darkness, cuz Link is too much of an earthy “heart” person to do it.

There that’s your next story guys, now go script it. shhh! I know that was a run on sentence, hop to it anyway.

All that being said, I’m enjoying this game anyway regardless of the lack of imagination on the part of the writers and will finish and reviewed it. This is the last time I buy Zelda though guys, unless something incredible and new is happening!

cat photo from icanhascheezburger.com

BioShock (360)

I’m just not a first person shooter kinda gal, I always move my head in the direction I want to go and can’t grasp the 3 dimensionality of the double analogue controls. The eerie ads for this one really intrigued me though. (Plus I wasn’t aware it was a FPS until I got it home… kind of an impulse grab it off the shelf and pay for it situation) needless to say I wasn’t prepared for the emotional involvement… um... involved? in playing a horror FPS. In the beginning when crazy guys ran at me singing Sunday school songs I panicked, faced the wrong way stared at the floor and couldn’t figure out which way was up, down, left or right with all the darkness, blood, screaming and instructions being yelled from a radio I picked up in an underwater elevator. It took about ten minutes to move with any confidence, I still freaked out every now and then when I wanted to see in a normal field of vision. They need to start making this sh*t in real polarised glasses 3D.

Photo courtesy of http://www.gamespot.com/

Another Super Idea by Enyo: The Wii Walker.

Lets take this whole realistic movement thing a step further, shall we? Now, knowing gamers as I do, this idea might not appeal to all of you, but please bear with me for a moment.

First they would have to create something like a Tony Gazelle or a mini elliptical machine to be able to change your speed without pressing more buttons. They couldn’t use just a mat like they do for the dance games, cuz it would be uber lame to be marching in one spot for hours in front of the TV. And they couldn’t use a stair climber-like apparatus because even I would be too lazy to use that for any length of time. But an adjustable resistance small rotation diameter elliptical would definitely work. They would of course, have to keep the directional controls in a hand held remote, otherwise what would happen if you needed to do a 180? You wouldn’t be facing the TV anymore…

Once it was all together though, imagine strolling across the fields of Hyrule, sneaking around in the darkness in Resident Evil or running towards the net in a game of tennis. Then of course for people who were too tired or lazy to walk anymore or after a particularly difficult part, they could put an option in the controls menu that switches it all back to manual controls.
Think about how sexy we’d all be with all that unnoticed exercise! RREOW

I Lied, These People are Probably Nerdier Than the Nature of the Zombie Debate

Nerd wearing an "I'm With Illogical --->" T-Shirt

This guy's gotta be at least 18... wonder if he impresses other ladies with his uniform and the size of his boyscout merit badge sash, cuz it certainly has me excited.

New Nerd Merit Badge Page

I'm having so much fun looking up girl and boy scout badges and applying them to amusing nerd activities and cliches, that I decided to put a few in the right margin here below the "About Me" and Blog Archive. I'm also working on a whole page of badges I've awarded myself and ones that would funny to award to others. Eventually it would be even cooler if I could put some reader submitted badges up.

The Trials and Tribulations of the Modern Zombie

I was extremely amused by this article written by Joe Dodson on Gamespot. Not only that, but I wet myself when I read that the new Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles utilises the Wii Zapper. How awesome is that? I raved about that being a wicked plan at the beginning of the month. Perhaps if I'm gonna have a gaming blog I should keep myself better posted on new things arising in the gaming world...

Back to the article though, not only was it an entertaining read, but the user comments merit Nerd Badges like nothing I've ever seen. (K, well maybe it's not as bad as a star trek or star wars convention...) There are arguments on what constitutes as a zombie, followed by definitions of zombies, etc. It goes back and forth for 11 pages! One guy even pointed out ""lich, sorcerer or even human"????? a sorcerer IS a human, you dimwit.... " Duh! : ) hahaha NERD! I really have to find a badge that fits the "I correct people about the nature of fantastical creatures as if it were grammar" Badge.

Zelda for Wii, I'm a Bit Let Down...

I will rant about this in the Bane of the Game portion of my review when I'm done the game, so I won't go on for too long.

I am very disapointed with the controls and I'm sure that Nintendo put a lot of energy and money into creating them, but what were they thinking making them so close to just a regular hand held controller that I'm not sure the super awesome Wii sensor is necessary. Perhaps it's because Twilight Princess was originally a Game Cube game and there was too much effort required to add the controls. Perhaps they think games would want to move around very much. If it was the later, then they could have put something in the options menu to switch to the regular controls. For those of you who haven't played it yet, the swinging of the sword requires the most subtle of wrist wiggles. We all know that many of you are very good at wrist wiggling ; ) but I'm sure that unless it's a game with pretty ladies (or wooly sheep for some) you'd rather swing a sword than make that 'get the ketchup out the bottle' motion and I fully agree with you!

Oh Smeg! You're a big piece of Baktag!

I was just reading my previous post and had to laugh at myself for my nerdy use of the Battle Star Galactica 'frack' word. HAHA I think I just earned me an "I use Sci-Fictional Swear Words on a Regular Basis" Nerd Merit Badge.

300 - 300 = who's the hero in this game?

I was watching the movie 300 for the hundredth time and the preview for the video game came on. It got the wheals turning in my brain and made me wonder: What the Frack is the point in playing a game where you know you're gonna be dead at the end?


Sorry for spoiling it if you haven't seen the movie yet, but Leonidas dies! They all die. So I would honestly have a problem playing a game in which I knew I would either die at the end or, more annoying, change history. It's like the South Park episode where, through the use of peppermint schnapps, Cartman tries to make the south win the the civil war re-enactment; It just wouldn't work.

Triumph The Insult Dog @ a Star Wars Movie Line Up

Probaly one of the funniest video's I've ever been emailed. The Lord of the Rings nerd is priceless and the Darth Vader 'which of these buttons calls your mother to pick you up' comment made me cry.


Star Wars - Triumph the insult comic Dog

PSP, Oy! Oy!

I got my hands on a PSP and though I was dumbstruck with how much better than my Gameboy Advance the graphics on it are, there are a few things that don't quite work for me. Why, oh why did the y put the plug for the power source on the bottom? The stupid thing falls out at the most inopportune moments. And the left analog stick is nothing short of agonising after more than 1/2 hour of play. I can only give this device one thumb up cuz the other is too sore to move.

Wii Zapper: Not Another Duck Hunt!

K, I am going to have a moment and think outside the Wii white box. How far have we really come? Yah the graphics are a million times better, but isn’t the Wii really just a recycled idea from what Nintendo had way back in the 80’s when they came out with duck hunt? Is this Wii “Zapper” not just a glorified little orange handgun? These thoughts came to me while I was ogling the picture on gamespot and thinking to myself that it would be awesome if they re-released Duck Hunt. Then I snapped back to reality (oh here comes gravity) and realised I don’t need a new version of Duck Hunt; I still have the OLD one and the gun. Even though most of you aren’t as privileged as I to still possess your NES, I still think it’s time they came out with something outdoorsy that’s cooler than Bass Fishing. Perhaps they could make a recognisable replica of our great northern forests or preserve for all time our dying rainforests in the form of a realistically animated video game land. You could trek through the woods and learn tracking and survival skills. The sky’s the limit with today’s technology…

A Small Package

Got my game, Drakan, in the mail today. Half of me is going 'WOOHOO, I love this game' and feeling almost like I got the She-ra DVD I ordered online eons ago and I'm remenising. The other half of me is saying "Oh Crap, it figures" cuz I stopped house sitting yesterday and don't have a ps2 now. (rabblerabblerabble) I know what I'm getting for x-mas : ) that and perhaps that singing game, so I can sing some rhianna and make a fool of myself, and God of War 2.

That She-Ra DVD would be nice too...

Wii Zapper

Have you seen this thing? Holy crap it looks like some kinda crazy futuristic laser riffle. I think I’ve actually found something that will motivate me to play one of those first person shooters like Halo 3 that everyone has gone crazy over. Then I can get my “Halo Nerd” merit badge to add to all the other nerd badges I already have. (Anyone else have the “Math is fun” or “I’ve played Star Trek games competitively online” badge?)

Back to the gun : ). So it will apparently be released with a demo game called Link’s Crossbow Practice on Nov 19th . (Crossbow my ass. Nintendo: always looking out for the youngsters’ sensibilities) Wonder how this will work and if I should wait to buy Resident Evil until after it’s released, or if the Wii system itself will have some kinda set up for it. How awesome would shooting some zombies be? If only I had a 50’ TV…

Zelda: TP

I’ve been wanting Zelda’s Twilight Princess forever. I have owned every Nintendo system just so I could play the series. I’ve still got everything from the Original NES to N64. (A little Who frame Roger Rabbit or Goldeneye, anyone?) I never got the Gamecube though, because I had a PS2 and XBox and they seemed to take up all my time. I would see the commercials for twilight princess and would get excited, but couldn’t justify buying a third system for just one game. Well now I have a Wii and can play all the NGC games on that and finally not only play Zelda: TP, but play it with the super awesome hack and slash Wii remotes. Now that I’ve recovered from my pathetic display of athletic Wii sports prowess (did you know the Wii fitness test told me I had a Wii age of 64?! How rude…) I’m ready to jump back on the wagon and cut up some baddies. I’ll let you know how it goes, if I’m physically capable once I put it down : )

Getting Side Tracked

So with all the Halloween festivities you'd think I would have found time for Silent Hill. We'll I haven't. I think maybe I need to start fresh and new. I um... "lost" my PS2 a couple years ago and haven't repalced it. I've been playing with my XBox & XBox 360 so I haven't had time to miss it. Though on a side note the PS3 with Heavenly Sword is lookin really good to me right now... but maybe I should invest in my Wii before getting that. Not enough time in a day for 3 first gen consoles. Focus, Enyo, Focus. We're getting ahead of ourselves...

Anyway, house sitting here with my friend I can play her PS2, so I decided to go online and order a couple of the games I used to have and can't find anywhere. One of the games I got was Drakan. This game Rocked. One of my favorite adventure games for playstation, in fact. I'll write something about it another day though. Back to needing some fresh Silent Hill meat. I also tried to order the Silent Hill they have available in the States for XBox, thinking it would be great to play at home by myself, but EB Games wouldn't let me order it. Something about it being unavailable for international shipping. What's up with that?

Ew that Monster Stinks, Oh Sorry That's Your Dog...

So I'm house sitting with a friend at her mom's house and we played some Silent Hill 2 yesterday. (Nothing better than a good sit down game while I recover from my Wii experience!) so this game is creepy to begin with, it's even creepier playing it in the dark in a strange house that has a really gross little dog that breaths out the same smell I think those weird acid throwing monsters would make.

I haven't played it for a year or so, but I don't remember the main character talking so much nonsense. He points out the obvious and does really stupid things. That took away from the game a bit, but it was still fun playing with my buddy. Sometimes she would hit the monsters and I would solve the puzzles then we'd switch it up. I don't think I would be able to play it here alone, at least not with the lights out and the little rotten, snorting dog in the room. I'll do the review for this one tomorrow. If you haven't played it yet though, it's a must buy!

OW!

Warning: Stretch before playing 2 hours of Wii Sports. I picked up Zelda yesterday but couldn't manage more than flopping my wrist around trying to kill the baddies. (which pisses me off that that worked, but I will go into that after I have a better less painful look at the game) My left butt cheek hurts from the squats I was doing for bowling and my right arm and back are on fire. I can't even laugh without my ribs hurting! I think next time I do a "Wii Workout" I'll switch it up and do some stuff left handed so I don't get disproportionate "Wii Muscles". like I've been using the bow flex religiouly only on one side...

OMG a Wii!!

I am so excited about the Wii I got this weekend. I played the sports games today for about 2 hours and couldn't put it down. So far my favorite game is the Tennis, though I felt very civilised playing the golf ; ).

The console allows you to create your own little avatar and one for as many friends as you like. Apparently during your gameplay if you create avatars for your friends they could pop in your game.

It also comes with a lot of little pieces like sensor bars and sensor bar mounts, cables wires and sticky adhesives. It's definitely not a console like the XBox that you can just throw down on the floor and not worry about it being kicked accidentally.

It also requires a lot of room for game play. In this age of 550 square foot condos, some will find it difficult to find a space in front of their TVs that they can swing their extended arms 360 degrees. When it's hooked up to the TV in my room I have to kneel on the bed to play, which is a bit of a pain, but leg movement isn't required so it works. I just have to move it or get used to sitting Japanese tea house style.

There are also a lot of warnings during gameplay like "make sure your wrist strap is secure" and "why don't you pause your game and go outside to play", which are fairly amusing especially the reason behind them.

I'm going to go get Zelda tomorrow. Can't wait to hack and slash!

Fable: I'd rather gouge out my eyes than play it another minute

I tried to play fable again today only this time in evil mode. Except for the burping and farting, it was no different from good mode. the missions were the same the map was exactly the same the options and spells were all the same escept for one. You'd think they would have change SOMETHING. I just found it plain boring and couldn'd play anymore. I think I'll just stop now and write the review. It is possible in this mind frame I won't write a fair review though, so perhaps I'll just start with The Bane of the Game and vent out my frustrations so I can start fresh tomorrow... I hate it when a really good game turns bad...

Put Some Freeking Clothes On, Buki!

So it turns out that Buki never puts her clothes on and goes through the entire game in a thong. (see:Sudeki (XBox)) What I thought was a pair of shorts in a cut scene wasn't. You never get used to the crazy combo controls. (see: Sudeki - Having Combo Inadequacy Nightmares) And the second to last and the last bad guys are freaking HARD. I might play the game again just to do the side missions. They give you time to do them whenver there's nothing pressing going on, but I always felt that I was "straying from the mission" when I went wandering the country side. It was an entertaining game, but it didn't turn me over to the dark side of anime. I remain faithful to Ranma 1/2, the one and only anime skeleton in my closet - who doesn't like pandas, after all?